humor:101_things_to_do_with_a_floppy_disk
101 Things to do With a floppy disk
- Frisbee!
- Sneak into Oscar Mayers and throw them in an industrial sausage press.
- Slap 'em in between two hunks of bread, some lettuce, and a couple of tomatoes and have a DLT (Disk, Lettuce & Tomato)
- Telsa Coil 'em
- Copy like a son-of-a-bitch!
- Hors D'oeuvres (you know-party food)
- No… No… that's too sick.
- Feed them to C.P.'s roommate.
- Label 'em..Sell them to unsuspecting COMMODE-DOOR kiddies as software… and make lot's of money.
- Frisbee with the cover on.
- Frisbee with the cover off.
- Nude Frisbee. (Much more fun that way)
- Twister… Now there's Red, Green, Blue, Yellow, and black
- Chew on them and pretend it's beef jerky.
- Draw little pictures on the disk in the slot (more fun when they're not your disks)
- Sell them to KGB.
- Contraceptive (not too effective)
- Draw cute little pictures in text.
_____ ____ | ! | / |_|| | O | |____| |_____|
- Tack 'em to the wall…
- Stack 'em high and jump in them like leaves.
- (3.5) put them in the drive upside down (But, it's double-sided, isn't it?)
- (5 1/4) cut extra r/w slits and have an 8-sided disk.
- Sharpen them to razor-sharp perfection and kill someone. (Tom)
- Share 'em with your friends.
- Paint them different colors so they'll look more 'Yuppie'
- Play poker.
- Play Solitare.
- Sex (No elaboration)
- Put something WRONG on a 'lifetime warranty' disk and get a new one.
- Blow a pile of them up in an effort to reduce the nuclear arms race.
- Forget it.
- Bake one into a Jello Casserole.
- How about a cake, or a souffle?
- Disk Pudding is good too.
- Try sponging.
- Nothing… Nothing at all.
- Could it be… SATAN????!!!!
- Flush it down the toilet, the cheesy bastard.
- String lots of them together and wear it as jewelry.
- Wash them periodically so they'll be squeaky clean.
- Take them to the zoo.
- Feed them to Otis.
- Munch on them on the plane down to Florida.
- Take a look at the stupid directions on the back of the disk envelope.
- Disobey the directions on the back of the disk envelope.
- Why the hell would you CARE what the hell you can do with a Goddam disk?
- build supersonic aircraft for the military.
- Make a kite.
- Use it as a hockey puck.
- Jump on it for a real blastin' good rockin' rad time DUDE!
- Kick a field goal.
- Read
- Write
- Experiment with magnets.
- Put programs on 'em? Nah
- Sell 'em to the DOD as a Star Wars Defence PLan.(and charge a shitload)
- Steal em.
- (Were hatin for ideas by now…)
- Dont feed 'em to an aligator.
- Use them to store data on dumb file like “101 things to do with disks”
- Magnetic Slurpies (but thats another G-file)
- See how many I/O errors you can get on one disk.(contests)
- If your gay…
- See if the printer will accept them (tractor feed)
- Send one to a friend (put a stamp on it and mail drop it)
- Put a 3.5 into a 5 1/4 inch drive.
- X-acto…
- Leave one in the sun for a tan.
- Keep 'em in your pocket.
- (were really hatin it now…)
- Put one in the CD player.
- Keep one in you walet for that 'Special Moment.'
- Disk races.
- See if one can find it's way out of a maze.
- Advanced swimming lessons.
- Build a house.
- (if you have a hard drive) Remove it.
- Use it.
- Lick it.
- _ it.
- Use it as a place mat.
- Sell 'em cheap.
- Earrings.
- (after washing/cause they cant go in dryer) hang em out to dry (in the sun).
- Wallpaper.
- Put little magnetic thingies on em and sell em for outragous prices.
- Junk food.
- Cut snowflakes out of them. (or little humans)
- Make designs in Bar-B-Q sauce on them.
- (only 11 more!!! Yippeee!! were loosin it…)
- Use em as credit cards.
- Try to use them to buy stuff (new form of magnetic money)
- Send em through airport security… ZIP!
- Shredding parties with Ollie!
- “I don't recall.” Ronald Reagan.
- Drink mixers.
- Line your bird cage with them.
- Pizza toppings.
- Use them in court cases(against yourself)
- (YEA! 100! What the hell are we gona say?) Forget to label them.
- Archery targets (or skeet… your preference)
humor/101_things_to_do_with_a_floppy_disk.txt · Last modified: 20/12/2021 04:57 by lrosa