Real SysOps

• Real Sysops have 2400 baud. There are a few exceptions.
• Real Sysops have a fan on their computer at all times.
• Real Sysops turn off their monitor as often as possible.
• Real Sysops have their own phone line without 'call-waiting.'
• Real Sysops turn their speaker off.
• Real Sysops have a good computer, such as an Amiga or IBM.
• Real Sysops turn off the ringer on their telephone.
• Real Sysops don't need a ramdisk.

• Real Sysops don't care if you say that your are putting up a board next summer.
• Real Sysops avoid 'Chat Mode' as often as possible.
• Real Sysops don't really beliver that was 'Apple Bandit' who just posted on the 'warez board.'
• Real Sysops know that it's not the mods that make a BBS great; it's the users.
• Real Sysops don't give access to someone just because they run “Sherwood Forest XXIII” and have 300 Megs.
• Real Sysops laugh when people say things like 'I have your phone number' or 'I am a phed.'
• Real sysops don't bother to answer the phone when they're using their computer because they know the guy will have heart failure and hang up.
• Real Sysops don't find it amusing when users leave numbers like: “Can-not-tell or PRI-VAT-E!!”.
• Real Sysops don't make excuses like “My dad is calling me” if they have to leave someone.

• Real Sysops don't trade 'warez'.
• Real Sysops don't post on 'warez boards.'
• Real Sysops don't have on-line A.E. and/or Catsend.
• Real Sysops aren't in any local 'warez clubs.'
• Real Sysops don't call A.E. lines and post their number with 10 names, as if to demonstrate that their board is great.

• Real Sysops don't take their BBS down every five minutes to call a board.
• Real sysops don't say 'L8R', 'K-Kool', 'B@SS' or any related terms.
• Real Sysops don't post their numbers on every known BBS.
• Real Sysops don't use 'text-trix.'
• Real Sysops don't post “Call the Spectrum Elite! ???/???-????'. They realize it's meaningless.
• Real Sysops don't leave mail to users asking them to post.

• Real Sysops get angry if their boards are crashed. Fortunately, real boards are rarely crashed, and real sysops make backups anyway.
• Real Sysops don't care about “improper signoffs.”
• Real Sysops don't think they are god and are better than everyone else.
• Real Sysops try to help the new users, not cut them down.
• Real Sysops know the difference between a new user and a loser.
• Real Sysops don't procrastinate.
• Real Sysops aren't hypocrites.
• Real Sysops couldn't care less about what some user posts about them on a loser board.
• Real Sysops put up a system as a service, not a catalyst.
• Real Sysops don't get out their handy dandy sector editor and plaster their name and number all over a new game.
• Real Sysops agree that Pirates of Puget Sound is a very complex and often confusing BBS.
• Real Sysops take pride in their BBS.
• Real Sysops don't care if users leave some obnoxious message 100 times in feedback. They realize that this user just learned macros.
• Real Sysops know that is their decision whether or not to sit in front of the computer all day. They don't care what some idiot says.

• Real Sysops don't really care about 'K-KOOL' mods such as the infamous spinning prompt.
• Real Sysops know how to spell.
• Real Sysops weren't envious of 'The Curse BBS'.
• Real Sysops don't have a 'Pin The Tail On The Donkey' game online.
• Real Sysops make sure that “E” is for Exit and that “C” is for Chat.
• Real Sysops don't have a command for every key on the keyboard.
• Real Sysops know that a disclaimer is useless, but they keep it for nostalgic reasons.
• Real Sysops do not have system errors on every other line.
• Real Sysops don't have an online add-your-own 'blacklist'.
• Real Sysops don't eat quiche!

This list of What A Real Sysop Is came from my friend Kent Filmore, the SYSOP of the Alchemy BBS in San Francisco. This was written June 16, 1985!

Paul Hulse