This document found floating around IBM's St. Louis office
AAC: Alter All Commands
AAD: Alter All Data
AAR: Alter At Random
AB: Add Backwards
ABR: Add Beyond Range
ACQT: Advance Clock to Quitting Time
ADB: Another Damn Bug (UNIX)
AFF: Add Fudge Factor
AFHB: Align Fullword on Halfword Boundary
AGB: Add GarBage
AI: Add Improperly
AIB: Attack Innocent Bystander
AMI: Adjust Memory for Inflation
AOI: Annoy Operator Immediate
AR: Alter Reality
ARN: Add and Reset to Non-zero
AS: Add Sideways
AWP: Argue With Programmer
AWTT: Assemble With Tinker Toys
BAC: Branch to Alpha Centurai
BAF: Blow All Fuses
BAH: Branch And Hang
BAM: Branch After Midnight
BB: Branch on Bug
BBI: Branch on Burned-out Indicator
BCF: Branch and Catch Fire
BCIL: Branch Creating Infinite Loop
BCR: Backspace Card Reader
BCU: Be Cruel and Unusual
BDC: Break Down and Cry
BDM: Branch and Disconnect Memory
BDT: Burn Data Tree (follows Decorate Data Tree)
BE: Branch Eventually
Branch Everywhere
BF: Belch Fire
BLP: Boot from Line Printer
BLM: Branch, Like, Maybe
BLMWM: Branch, Like, Maybe, Wow, Man
BLSC: Branch on Lapsed Service Contract
BM: Branch to Monday
BMP: Branch and Make Popcorn
BNA: Branch to Nonexistent Address
BNO: Branch on New Operator
BNR: Branch for No Reason
BPEOR: Bypass End Of Reel
BPIM: Bury Programmer In Manuals
BPP: Branch on Programmer Present
BRA: BRanch Anywhere
BRL: BRanch and Leak
BSM: Branch and Scramble Memory
BSST: Backspace and Stretch Tape
BT(BRT): Branch on Tuesdays
BTK: Back To Kansas
BW: Branch on Whim
BWOP: BeWilder OPerator
CAAL: Compute Answer And Loop
CAB: Crash And Burn
CAG: Convert
ASCII to Greek
CAIL: Crash After I Leave
CAT: Confused And Tired (UNIX)
CBA: Compare and Branch Anyway
CBNC: Close, But No Cigar
CC: Call Cavalry
CCD: Clear Core and Dump
CEE: Cause Errors Elsewhere
CF: Come From
CH: Create Havoc
CIB: Change Important Byte
CIMM: Create Imaginary Memory Map
CL: Call Lawyer
CMD: Compare Meaningless Data
CMI: Clobber Monitor Immediate
CML: Compute Meaning of Life
CNB: Cause Nervous Breakdown
COLB: Crash for Operator's Lunch Break
COS: Copy Object code to Source file
COWHU: Come Out With Hands Up
CPB: Create Program Bug
CPR: Compliment PRogrammer (like, “aren't you cute”)
CRASH: Continue Running After Stop or Halt
CRM: Clear Random Memory
CRN: Convert to Roman Numerals
CS: Crash System
CSL: Curse and Swear Loudly
CSN: Call Supervisor Names
CVFL: ConVert Floating to Logical
CVFP: ConVert Fortran to Pascal
DA: Develop Amnesia
DAP: De-select Active Peripheral
DBL: Desegregate Bus Lines
DBZ: Divide By Zero
DC: Degauss Core
DCGC: Dump Confusing Garbage to Console
DD: Destroy Disk
DDC: Dally During Calculations
DDWB: Deposit Directly in Wastepaper Basket
DEC: Decompile Executable Code
DIE: DIsable Everything (UNIX during hardware errors?)
DIRFO: Do It Right For Once
DK: Destroy Klingons
DKP: Disavow Knowledge of Programmer
DLN: Don't Look Now
DMAG: Do MAGic (the only command a programmer really needs)
DMPE: Decide to Major in Phys Ed
DPC: Decrement Program Counter
DPMI: Declare Programmer Mentally Incompetent
DSI: Do Something Interesting
DSTD: Do Something Totally Different
DSUITv: Do Something Utterly, Indescribably, Terrible
DTC: Destroy This Command
DTI: Do The Impossible
DTVFL: Decrement Third Variable From Left
DWIM: Do What I Mean
EBB: Empty Bit Bucket
EBRS: Emit Burnt Resistor Smell
ECO: Electrocute Computer Operator
ECP: Erase Card Punch
EDD: Eat Disk and Die
EDIT: Erase Data and Increment Time
EEP: Erase Entire Program
EIAO: Execute In Any Order
EIOP: Execute Invalid OPcode
ENA: Enable Anything
ENF: Emit Noxious Fumes
EOB: Execute Operator and Branch
ERM: Erase Reserved Memory
EROM: Erase Read Only Memory
ESL: Exceed Speed of Light
ESS: Enable Sprinkler System
EXX: (a real instruction on the Zilog Z-80) (Zilog is owned by Exxon)
FB: Find Bugs
FD: Forget Data
FLD: FLing Disk
FLI: Flash Lights Impressively
FM: Forget Memory
FRG: Fill with Random Garbage
FSM: Fold, Spindle, and Mutilate
GBC: Go to the Back of the Class
GCAR: Get Correct Answer Regardless
GDP: Grin Defiantly at Programmer
GIE: Generate Irreversible Error
GND: Guess the Next Digit
GORS: GO Real Slow
GPS: Give Programmer the Shaft
GREP: Global Ruin, Expiration and Purgation (UNIX)
HAH: Halt And Hang
HCRS: Hang in CRitical Section
HELP: type “no HELP available”
HF: Hide a File
HOO: Hide Operator's Output
IBR: Insert Bugs at Random
IDI: Invoke Divine Intervention
ILI: Ignore Last Instruction
IP: Increment and Pray
IPW: Invert Print Wheel
ISC: Insert Sarcastic Comment
ISP: Increment and Skip on Pi
IU: Ignore User
JAA: Jump Almost Always
JFI: Jump to Following Instruction
JFM: Jump on Full Moon
JLP: Jump and Lose Pointer
JNL: Jump when programmer Not Looking
KP: Krunch Paper
KUD: Kill User's Data
LB: Look Busy
LOSM: Log Off System Manager
LPA: Lead Programmer Astray
LSPB: Left Shift Parity Bits
MAN: Make Animal Noises (UNIX)
MAZ: Multiply Answer by Zero
MBTD: Mount Beatles on Tape Drive
MBTOL: Move Bugs To Operator's Lunch
MDB: Move and Drop Bits
MDDHAF: Make Disk Drive Hop Across Floor
MLP: Make Lousy Program
MMLG: Make Me Look Good
MNI: Misread Next Instruction
MRZ: Make Random Zap
MWT: Malfunction Without Telling
OML: Obey Murphy's Law
PBC: Print and Break Chain
PBM: Pop Bubble Memory
PEHC: Punch Extra Holes in Card
PIBM: Pretend to be an IBM
POW: Print Obscene Words
PUL: Print in Unknown Language
RA: Randomize Answers
RAU: Ridicule All Users
RBAO: Ring Bell and Annoy Operator
RBEOR: Read Beyond End Of Reel
RCB: Read Commands Backward
RCR: Rewind Card Reader
RDA: Refuse to Disclose Answer
RDCH: Read Disk and Crash Head
RDI: Reverse Disk Immediate
RENVR: REName Variables Randomly
RF: Read Fingerprints
RHP: Read Hub Protector
RLI: Rotate Left Indefinitely
RLP: Refill Light Pen
RPB: Read, Print and Blush
RTP: Reduce ThroughPut
SAI: Skip All Instructions
SAS: Sit And Spin
SDD: Seek out and Destroy Data
SDE: Solve Differential Equations
SFH: Set Flags to Half-mast
SFT: Stall For Time
SOS: Sign Off, Stupid
SPS: Smoke Power Supply
SRO: Sort with Random Ordering
SSJ: Select Stacker and Jam
STO: Strangle Tape Operator
STPR: SToP Rain
SUI: Subtract User's IQ
SUP: Solve Unsolvable Problem
SUR: Screw Up Royally
SUS: Stop Until Spring
SWT: Select Wrong Terminal
TARC: Take Arithmetic Review Course
TBGTG: Two BurGers and fries To Go
TC: Transmit Colors
TCAR: Transmit Colors, but Avoid Red
TLO: Turn indicator Lights Off
TLW: Transfer and Lose Way
TN: Take a Nap
TPDH: Tell Programmer to Do it Him/Her self
TRA: Te Rdls Arvs (Type Ridiculous Abbreviation)
TT%EKB: TeleType - Electrify Keyboard
TTA: Try, Try Again
TTL: Tap Trunk Line
UAI: Use Alternate Instruction set
UCB: Uncouple Comm lines and Break
UEP: Update and Erase Program
UP: Understand Program
VAX: Violate All eXecutions
VFO: Violate Female Operator
VMA: Violate Maintenance Agreement
VNO: Violate Noise Ordinance
VVM: Vaporize Virtual Memory
VW: Void Warranty
WAD: Walk Away in Disgust
WBF: Write Bad File
WDI: Write Data and Ignore
WHP: Wave Hands over Problem
WQWH: Write Quietly With Hangover
WSWW: Work in Strange and Wondrous Ways
XKF: eXecute Kermit the Frog
XMB: eXclusive MayBe
XOS: eXchange Operator's Sex
YKWIM: You Know What I Mean